The Book of Our Lives

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We wake up in the morning and if our minds are open to the flow of past memories, something shows up that wants our attention.
A project we didn’t complete, mistakes that were made, opportunities that weren’t taken, things that weren’t said or were said.
Regrets.
And we think, was courage absent?
Did we give it our best? And if not, why not?
Were we living on the edge?
If not, why not?
Were we communing with ourselves? Or were too busy for that priceless dialogue?
Ever doubt that we have courage?
Look again. It’s there. Anxious to be called forth. Just waiting to be summoned. Ready to spring into action.
We all have courage. We come with it. It’s part of the equipment that nature gives us to do battle in our lives.
Like muscle, if we don’t use it, it withers away, may even go into hiding, but it never disappears entirely. So long as we have breath.
And what a joy it is to see it step forward.
In our daily battle for existence, all steps require some degree of courage to say ‘I’m here. I am alive.’
If we make mistakes, let’s fix them and learn from them.
Courage will be the first to admit that exercising it comes with mistakes.
To not exercise it daily is to bury ourselves, little by little.
We can call courage by another name, say affirmation. I prefer the word courage.
It’s raw, summons defiance, quiet or loud, small or large, shy or outrageous.
As the river that each of us is streams through life, courage is the force that defines us.
‘He/she did this. He/she did that.’
Each act of creation an act of courage.
And every day of our lives demands acts of creation or else we atrophy, shrivel, devalue our possibilities.
There’s too much to do in life. Too much injustice, too much ignorance, too much violence, too much indifference, too much conceit, for us to remain aloof.
The river that each of our lives is needs to flow to enrich other lives and by that measure our existences will be judged to have been worthy or not.
Because there is that possibility, isn’t there? The possibility that our lives will amount to nothing at all. To have existed and done nothing.
To have benefitted from other people’s efforts but contributed zero to the human project.
Every morning, upon awakening, life demands that we be courageous.
That we improve our existences and impact that of others.
Succumb to fear or face it.
Facing our past mistakes is facing our history. The book of our life opens a page every morning.
So let us read it. It is there to show us the path forward.
There, for us to write in our choices.

What a Father Can Teach his Daughter or Son

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He can teach them they are unique. No one exactly like them has come before or will come after. And so the child’s task is to express their possibilities in the world they inherit.
A world where the contributions of many are already manifest and there to be used.
One hundred years ago, air travel was in its infancy, the car industry was just getting on. Medical care was vastly more limited. Life expectancy much shorter. People didn’t think smoking cigarettes was a problem. The movies had yet to have sound or color and never mind computers and smartphones.
It took the effort of many to get us where we are.
A father can teach his daughter or son that the more developed world they’re inheriting, with all its problems, is both a gift from all who have come before, and a challenge to improve it.
To answer the challenge, the child must discover what they are good at and which ability they enjoy the most. This search is crucial, for it will be the ability they enjoy the most the one where they will be the most productive.
Committing to it, will make them less envious of others, for the child will be able to say, ‘I know what I have. You know what you have. I have my power. You have yours. I have my limits, you have yours, so let us do what we must.’
Some things the daughter or son will know to do intuitively. But if they have a little hesitancy, they may need to be gently reminded that achieving physical, emotional and sexual intimacy with someone they love is crucial to their wellbeing and overall growth.
A father can teach their child to be kind to others. Everyone, but specially to those who, for one reason or another, have had difficulty realizing their possibilities.
A father can teach their child how fundamental it is that they understand their emotions. Without such understanding we cannot have a full mind, for to have a mind is to have the capacity to reason while integrating our emotions.
Which then enables the child to fully express their essence, which in turn leads them to embrace freedom.
A life is not well lived if human beings cannot speak their minds.
A life is not well lived if the person is too frightened to make clear who they are, to fully manifest the core of their being. It amounts to cheating yourself and the rest of us, choosing to simply pass through without leaving a mark.
To be in hiding is to waste a life, to dishonor those who gave to us.
A father can help his child not err in such manner.
And should the father commit to the task, there are rewards for him, too, for seeing that he can influence another human being, he will find inspiration to fulfill what he has not yet.
Give and it will come back to you in ways unexpected.
A father can help deliver a daughter or son onto the world, but it will be up to the woman or man to come into their own.
A word on fame or material riches. The pursuit of them without personal development, emotional and intellectual, will not let you appreciate them, for if you happen to hold them, they will slip through your fingers.
It’s never too late to start.

Oscarvaldes.medium.com